Dear Readers,

I must confess – I seem to be floating on a pond of wisdom today. This morning in my journal two big thoughts came out onto the page and left a mess of glitter and joy.

The first thought:

I AM THE OWNER OF MY SPARKLE

and the question I HAVE to ask myself is: Why has it taken me 37 years to figure this out?

December has been an emotionally tough month for me. I made the decision to be by myself AND THEN I met someone who made me glow and sparkle and feel so much happiness and joy….and then he left. Leaving me with emotional whiplash, pain, anger and sadness.

When I first met this guy I thought that he was the answer to all my problems. He was the one who was going to make me happy. Then he told me that he couldn’t handle it all right now and I haven’t really heard from him since (ok – he replied to some of my unhinged and drunk text messages…bad Laura…but otherwise…silence).

Yet as I sit here at my dining room table, drinking my tea I ask myself – why should i leave the keys to my happiness in someone else’s hands? Why should someone else make me glow?

And so I made the decision – there is one person that I want to spend my life with – and that is ME and to do that I need to love and accept myself for all I am worth – and I AM WORTH A LOT!

If I want to glow and sparkle again – then I need to do it myself.

The second thing I wrote today:

It’s really hard to love yourself when the world and our culture keeps pointing out what’s wrong with you.

And you know what I mean with this.

We get told constantly

• You’re too fat
• You’re too thin
• You’re too muscly
• You don’t have enough muscle
• Your lips are too big/small/round/square
• You’re too single
• You’re too much in a relationship
• You’re too happy
• You’re too sad
• You’re too much

how are we supposed to love ourselves when this gets pushed in our faces all the time?

Yet there is only one You. And you are the only one who can be YOU! You are the only one with your personality, your appearance. OWN IT!

I used to be horribly afraid of getting old, of losing my looks.

Why?

Now I think: my wrinkles are a road map to my life. I have wrinkles near my eyes because I smile and laugh a lot. Why should I hide the fact that I experience joy?

(Although I do perform an act of self-love which is putting SPF 50 sun screen on my face every morning because I want to protect my skin from UV…)

So dear readers – are you ready to join me as I just discover…who I am? I guess the lesson I’m learning being me is…me?

What a f*cking plot twist.

Love you all!

Have a great day,

Laura xoxoxoxo